I have written about the feeling that I sometimes get while being home with Emma. It has nothing to do with Emma and is absolutely all about me. I have called the feeling that of a caged lion. Well, that cat was back last week in a bad way.
I am not sure if mothers who stay at home get this feeling. I am not sure if it is because I have always worked, done my own thing, got married at age 35, had freedom, or whatever but I know it is something I have had to deal with the last couple years.
This feeling is one that is unsettling to say the least. I feel guilty feeling it because in some way I feel it betrays Emma. It is similiar to anxiety although I wouldn’t say that is exactly what it is. I get very antsy and feel “tied down” and “stuck” with no options or way to relieve the feeling. I get anxious and sometimes feel like I have to pace around the house. Running around with Emma helps but not as much as I would like. It could have been due to being stuck in the house over the long winter we had too but I made the effort to go out with Emma to the mall alot in spite of it. Potential stay at home dads take heed of this caged lion as I am sure it is not exclusive to me. Stay at Home Dad Tip
Last week it was exacerbated by the fact that little cutie pie Emma decided that she wasn’t going to take her nap–even though she was tired. Hmmmm, maybe she also had the caged lion feeling? Anyway, a ‘gigantically’ important thing for me is that she gets her nap. It not only gives me a break but also prevents the demon child from really coming out in the early evening just in time for Mama. I get very frustrated when I try my very best and she doesn’t fall asleep. The process makes me tired and then I have to get up with her and entertain and play with her when she is still tired.. I know, the old-schoolers out there are probably saying to themselves, “Just let her cry herself to sleep, when she is tired enough she will sleep.” Well, for me, the thing that is even more stressful than Emma not taking a nap is hearing her cry and cry…. Not going to happen.
Well, I made it through the week and am really looking forward to Mama going out of town for a few nights–Not! Whenever she has to go out of town a different feeling takes over, one that is akin to going to school when you didn’t do your homework and it is due. Do all spouses, hello mothers out there, feel this way??
Emma likes to wear Melissa’s shoes. She started out with slippers and now has begun to wear her high heel shoes. It is the funniest thing to see her walking around in high heels like she is just sooo big! I taped her and have uploaded it here.
Several new words that she is using extensively now are OK and Why? Where she learned this I am not sure, the Why probably from her mother as I have heard that many times! 🙂
Yesterday we introduced her to Peanut Butter. MMMMMM, did she like it too! Another food in our repertoire!
I haven’t been writing as much due in part to the rough week so look for this to improve as the weather is getting nice and we are getting outside lots!
A cute video clip of Emma!